Pink Flamingo Hospitality Program: A Personal Reflection

Sky Guilbaud.

The Miami-Dade Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce (MDGLCC) invited YES Institute to conduct a training for members of Miami’s hotel and tourism industry as part of their new “Pink Flamingo Hospitality Program.”

When I was invited to be one of the YES Institute Speakers at the Pink Flamingo workshops, a rush of excitement came over me, and at the same time, I began to reflect on my own experience around gender in the workplace. Why would I be so jazzed about training employers and human relations professionals in the hospitality industry on the impact of gender and orientation? I know the difference communication and education can make, and I know first hand what it’s like to undergo a gender transition and not have the support of my employer.

I was born and assigned female, and my gender expression is male. I used to work at a fast food restaurant, and it was difficult to share my transition with my bosses and coworkers. For a year, I never corrected anyone when they called me “she.” I already had an overwhelming amount of rejection at home, and I didn’t think I could bare it at work, too. I was scared that my coworkers - people who really didn’t know me - could possibly hurt me physically.

I recalled the time I was taking orders in the drive-thru and a customer said, “Thank you sir!” The excitement was instantaneous and a smile spread across my face. For the first time, someone used my preferred pronoun and it felt amazing. It was a huge shift compared to the unsettling feeling when people would call me “ma’am.” My smile vanished when a co-worker overheard the exchange over the P.A. system and starting laughing. She screamed, “He thinks you’re a man!” My heart grew sad and confused, and I felt like crawling into a dark corner to disappear.
 

Sky addressing Miami hospitality industry managers and executives.

I really felt stuck when it came to using the bathroom. I thought everyone in the restaurant felt conflicted or confused about my transition, so I thought it would be uncomfortable (for them and for me) if they saw me walking in or out of the men’s bathroom. Most of the time, I would just “hold it” until I got home, to avoid the awkward tension or confrontation. When it came to my job, I always showed up, but I was never really there.

At YES Institute, my experience is a complete contrast to my previous work experience, and shows me what’s possible when communication and education are present. My coworkers acknowledge me the way I see myself, using my preferred pronoun and chosen name. I feel like I have so much more space to be who I am, and I’m actually excited to come to work!

Rachel Sottile, YES Institute Executive Director and Joseph Zolobczuk, Director of Education.

When I shared this story with the participants at MDGLCC’s Pink Flamingo Hospitality training, their questions revealed their commitment to creating safe and supportive workplaces for customers and co-workers. Eager for solutions, the audience listened intently as Rachel Sottile, the Executive Director of YES Institute, shared how a simple inquiry about preferred pronouns, or an employee’s preferred name, could impact the entire experience for their clients and employees.

I see the world shifting around gender, and the continued need for communication and education. As YES Institute gets set to provide training on gender and orientation to the hospitality industry, I see the opportunity for the corporate leaders I met at the Pink Flamingo Hospitality Program to take action and make a difference in their industry, not only for their customers, but also their employees. 

Pink Flamingo™ logo.